Time to Say...Good-bye

When I got sick last year I felt a need to tie up loose ends. I had a few unresolved things I needed to resolve. I had a few apologies to make from my past, and I had a few thank you's to give.

I took an inventory of my life and knew where I shined and when I did not. I wanted to acknowledge my short comings. To those I was short to. Set things right, if you know what I mean. Clear the air.

So several of you heard from me. Thank you so much for listening to me.

There were two relationships I had really hoped to repair, or at least set on a different track. Both of them, were friendships I made when I lived in Colorado. I lost contact with each of them during a super deep, super dark part of my life, my divorce from The Boy's father. It was never that the relationships became unimportant to me, it was more of a matter of not knowing how to care for myself and just sinking inside myself.

I lost my own way for a few years. It was all I could do to survive. I was pretty needy back then. Probably for the first time in my life, I found myself taking from my relationships and not giving to them. I can say this now, I was sad. I was probably even clinically depressed. It took some time but I also got my groove back!

As soon as I was back on equal footing, I reached out to my two lost but important relationships. One was easy and quick. The other relationship was a bit harder for me. She moved around and we actually lost contact. My occasional attempts to locate her came up empty. Last year when I got sick, I vamped up my attempts to locate her and I got super lucky, I found her Momma. She at least told me where I could find my lost friend and after doing a quick Internet search I had her address and phone number.

I was finally able to reach out to both.

In my head and heart I honesty expected her to answer back with an "it's okay, we all go through hard times, glad to have you back" type of response. After all, it is what I would say. But the reality is far from different. I met with shut doors...doors made of steel.

I have fretted over these two relationships for a long time. I have prayed that things will be different. But that steel is strong and it has not moved. It has not given in the slightest.

I have an in-common friend with one of my lost relationships. We just recently spent time together and I swore I was not going to discuss this with her...again! But over drinks there I go, rehashing it and talking about it all over again. In the nicest way possible, my friend told me it was time to say good-bye (okay, maybe it took a 2x4 against my temple).

Sadly, I know she is right. So, I have spent the night mentally saying good-bye to these two relationships that once meant so much to me. It is especially hard for me to say good-bye because I just know that if the tables were turned, I would have treated them differently.

We do not get to always decide the course of our relationships. Sometimes others make decisions for us. The best we can do is make peace with the decisions of others.

My Weekend Project: A PVC Camping Lamp Post and Flag Holder

I have seen a few of these around campsites and I knew I would like to have one. The only problem that I had is The Husband. He already thinks we drag too much stuff with us when we go camping and if I had told him my desire to have a PVC Camping Light Pole he would have shut it down quickly! So, that leaves a girl with only one choice: Figure out how to do it by herself. I did some internet searching and found a few road maps on RV forums. They seemed easy enough! I visited the local hardware store for the supplies: An exterior post lantern light 2 inch PVC pipe (I used 5 feet but had to purchase a 10 foot piece) A 3 inch toilet flange A 3 inch to 2 inch Reducer PVC Glue A 12 foot electric cord kit 2 - 3/4 inch PVC Caps I also used a few supplies we already had on hand: White Spray Paint 3 1/2 foot - 3/4 inch PVC Pipe Drill Bits (1 inch and 1/2 inch) Tent Stakes The first step was preparing the lantern light. I could only find black i...

Liver Cheese: A Family Tradition

Today is an anniversary date. One of those dates you wish you did not have to remember but there is no way you can forget. Fifteen years ago today,two days after his birthday, my father died of lung cancer. He was a lifelong smoker and his cancer was aggressive. His battle was short. He fought for six short months after his diagnosis. He knew the chemo was not working and that his time was limited. When he came to this realization he became the best dad in the world. In the days before my father's passing, my family shared some memorable moments. One of those moments centers around the deli meat: Liver Cheese.I would not be surprised if you have never heard of it, or even never tasted it. But I was raised on it as it was one of my Dad's favorite things. What is it? Well, it is a German food that is...

Tonsillectomy (Warning Photos!)

The Short Chic came down with a pretty nasty case of strep throat back in April. So, when The Boy started complaining about his throat hurting about 12 days later, I was pretty confident that he had inherited his sister's strep. Instead, The Boy was diagnosed with a peritonsillar abscess growing on his right tonsil. We had to immediately see an ENT Physician who took a needle and drained the abscess. He removed about 5.5 cc of puss from The Boys throat.and then told us that once you have a peritonsillar abscess you were high risk to keep getting them. The Boy's tonsils were now compromised and needed to be removed. We were told to plan for a two week recovery so we worked a surgery into our summer plans. Between family vacations, summer sports, and the beginning of school The Boy had his second surgery. A tonsillectomy. Pre-surgery prepping went well. It must be nice to be young and have healthy veins for an IV! The Boy had lots of pre-surgery vi...

It's My Life

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